Bridgerton Season 2 (2022): Focusing on Kate and Anthony’s Love-Hate Relationship
Have you ever had a feeling of hating someone, but eventually that feeling turned into love?
Some people believe that the feelings of love and hate are almost the same. What makes them different is that love refers to a more positive meaning, while hate tends to be negative. It’s always been interesting to discuss this matter, to make the discussion to be understood easier, we can look at Kate and Anthony’s story in Bridgerton 2!
Before we discuss more about Kate and Anthony’s frienemies relationship, we should understand the meaning of a “love-hate relationship” first. According to Cambridge Dictionary, a love-hate relationship is a strong feeling which is mixed feelings of love and hate towards someone or something. The researchers called this relationship an “ambivalent relationship”, it marks a conflict and tension that involve positive and negative feelings toward others (Melwani & Rothman, 2015). Then, how do love-hate relationships develop in social interaction?
Based on Harvard Business Review (2015), love-hate relationships do not only happen in a romantic relationship. Otherwise, it can also emerge from non-romantic relationships such as colleagues, friends, family, and new acquaintances. Back to the love story of Kate and Anthony in Bridgerton. In my point of view, their love story began with the feeling of hatred at meeting a new acquaintance. Firstly, come from Kate Sharma. As we have already known, Kate Sharma is the first-born daughter in her family. She has a little sister named Edwina Sharma. They are mixed blood, the father is an Indian and the mother is a Briton. Except for Kate, she is pure Indian, because she was born from a different mother than Edwina.
The family came to England intending to marry off Edwina Sharma. Kate, who is the first-born daughter, felt responsible to find an eligible husband for her sister as their father had died. Fast forward, both Kate and Edwina were introduced by Lady Danbury to the marriage market in London. Coincidentally, this season, Mrs. Violet Bridgerton announced that her eldest son, Anthony Bridgerton was looking for Viscountess.
As the Viscount, Anthony felt responsible to fulfill his duty to the family and society, he needs to find the best wife for him as soon as possible. He said in one of the scenes that he must obtain a future wife who reads (this obviously shows an intelligent ability) and is physically beautiful. Shortly, after he sorted out countless ladies in London, he found out that Edwina Sharma suited his requirements the most. On the other hand, as Kate is extremely observant and selective about men who approach her sister, she accidentally eavesdrops Viscount’s purpose for finding a wife. Hearing such a statement, she was angry. It is because her purpose in marrying off her sister is to find true love, not to make her sister trapped in a loveless marriage like Viscount imagined. Additionally, if her sister married the Viscount, she would only become a puppet who fulfilled her husband’s role in England’s society.
From that point, Kate’s first impression of the Viscount was really bad. Otherwise, the Viscount felt challenged by Kate’s attitude. He wanted to acquire permission to marry her sister whatever it takes. Their interaction probably made them grow closer to each other. Truth to be told, both Kate and Anthony have a lot in common. First, they both are the firstborn in the family. They knew how it felt to be the eldest kid in the family such as the responsibility to look after their younger siblings as well as the expectation from parents and society. There is too much to handle, they have to be strong. If their younger siblings have their eldest siblings to rely on, the eldest kid in the family doesn’t have that kind of privilege.
Second, the study shows that the eldest kids in the family have a close relationship with their fathers (Jessee & Adamsons, 2018). Moreover, a father who is actively involved in children’s early education promotes positive development and outcomes for them (Adamsons & Johnson, 2013). It turns out that Anthony and Kate have a special bonding with their fathers when they were young. The bonding was formed from outdoor activities such as horse riding and hunting. Specifically, these kinds of activities help children to develop the skills demanded by the family, personal beliefs, and societal expectations (Palkovitz, 2007).
Third, as we have discussed in the first point, Kate and Anthony do not have someone to rely on. Since their duty as firstborn in the family expect them to be strong for whole family members; therefore, by having a deep conversation, they found that they understand their feelings each other. This interaction makes them grow closer and have empathy for one another. According to the research, people who have the same ways of thinking are likely to have intimate connections and make a great team for lifelong companionship. As Davis & Rusbult (2001) argue that long-life relationships can be maintained “when the individuals develop and maintain similar interests and continue to share their important values and beliefs over time.”
Conclusively, a love-hate relationship can happen to anyone whether it is a romantic or non-romantic relationship. As in Kate and Anthony’s case, they are meant to be together from hating then turn into loving each other. Life is full of unexpected things, indeed. My message for all of you is:
Don’t hate or love another human being too much. You won’t know what happen in the future. Who knows? Probably your enemy might turn into your lover, or contrarily?
References:
Adamsons, K. & Johnson, S. (2013). An updated and expanded meta-analysis of nonresident fathering and child well-being. Journal of Family Psychology doi: 10.1037/a0033786.
Cambridge Dictionary. (2022). Love-hate relationship. https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/love-hate-relationship
Davis, J. L., & Rusbult, C. E. (2001). Attitude alignment in close relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 81(1), 65–84.
Jessee, V. & Adamsons, K. (2018). Father Involvement and Father-Child Relationship Quality: An Intergenerational Perspective. Journal of Family Psychology. doi: 10.1080/15295192.2018.1405700.
Melwani, S. & Rothman, N. (2015). Research: love-hate relationship at work might be good for you. Harvard Business Review. https://hbr.org/2015/01/research-love-hate-relationships-at-work-might-be-good-for-you
Palkovitz, R. (2007). Challenges to modeling dynamics in a developmental understanding of father-child relationships. Journal of Applied Developmental Science. doi: 10.1080/10888690701762050.
